by James Han, the Tay Trefenwyd wanna-be, though why anyone would want to be a guy that dies halfway before the book ends is beyond me... oops, spoiler, sorry. :P

ANYWAY...

written Thursday, 31 December 1998 © (steal this and DIE ;P)

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Tay: Get up, hon.
Wil: *snore*
Tay: ...
Wil: *snort snort* Hah? What? WHERE AM I??? *loud sobs*
Tay: Urm, my bed.
Wil: *sob sob so-* What? Oh.
Tay: Why were you napping in the afternoon anyway? You know we have to get ready for our evening in San Francisco tonight.
Wil: *makes a face* That's why I was napping, to save my strength. You're gonna be dragging me all around the city tonight! I wanted to stay at home and watch "A New Year's Rockin' Eve" and watch that pretty glowing ball drop, but noooOOOOooo, you just HAD to insist that we go see Phantom of the Opera instead and then go eat some fancy dinner up in the city.
Tay: *stares disgustedly* I'd call you a Philistine except I'd be insulting them by doing so.
Wil: *eyes get all big and watery* You wouldn't be so mean to me if you knew the real reason why I wanted to stay home.
Tay: *crosses arms* Do tell.
Wil: *blushes and looks down* Well... if you and me stayed home today, *fidgets* we'd have more time to... you know... *blush gets darker*
Tay: *laughs his ass off* Oh please! You just want to stay home and watch "New Year's Rockin' Eve" or whatever because the stupid Backstreet Boys are gonna be on and you think Brian is cute. *still laughing* I guess he is, but that's besides the point! So nice try, but we're still going to the city. *pauses* Wil? I said we're still going to the- Wil? WIL! Stop that! Get off me! You're heavy, get OFF! Ow, hahahah, that tickles! HAHAHAHAAAA! Stop, stop! We're gonna be late to Phantom of the... of the... of...

*later, in a posh restaurant in San Francisco*

Tay: *sips tea* Well, I hope you're happy. As if being so late that we missed the first half of Phantom wasn't bad enough, you had to fall asleep and SNORE throughout the entire second half. *sip* I'm surprised you didn't get us kicked out!
Wil: *eating angel hair pasta very messily, with sauce stains on his face* Well, you always wear me out! Besides, no one noticed me. *slurps up angel hair*
Tay: Oh, of course they didn't. That's why those two actors who stayed behind for the Q&A session after the show called your snoring "the REAL music of the night." *sip*
Wil: Eh heh heh... Oh! Did you know that "Auld Lang Syne" translates to "Old Long Since"?
Tay: *sip* Yes, I did know that, and trying to change the subject won't work. You're in trouble when we get home.
Wil: *grins* I like the sound of that.
Tay: *blinks twice* *does not sip his tea* What the hell happened to you? You've been feisty all day. *wonders about something Wil ate for breakfast, called Spanish fly*
Wil: I think the author's getting tired of having me be so prissy all the time.
Tay: ... Oh. *smiles and nods* Well, trust me, I'm not complaining.
Waitress: Is everything okay here? Was the food okay?
Wil: Eretria? Why are you working here?
Tay: Yeah, weren't you still working in that cheesy strip joint near Chinatown?
Eretria: *glares at Tay* Well, I quit! The people at the GGGG weren't paying me enough money for my... many talents. *flashes her trademark smile at Wil*
Wil: *doesn't notice* Hah? GGGG?
Eretria: The Gorgeous Gypsy Goodtime Girls. Those ninnies refused to pay me proper money for my act just cause I included knives, picklocks, and horses in my strip routine!
Wil: *turns pale* Horses?
Eretria: Yeah! I tried to give these perverted city freaks a taste of Rover culture and I get gypped for it!
Tay: *sip* That's nice, Catherine the Great all over again.
Eretria: What?
Tay: Nothing. Wil and I want to share a tiramisu once we finish eating, so can you please get it for us? *sip*
Eretria: *eyes get wide* No way, you pervert, there's no way you're sharing some romantic dessert with Wil. Not while I'm your waitress.
Tay: Do you want us to leave you any tip at all? Or was quitting your last job so fun that you want to get yourself fired from this one? *sip*
Eretria: One tiramisu, COMING RIGHT UP! *dashes off*

*later that night, still in the restaurant*

Some Random Waiter: It's almost midnight, everyone! Ten seconds and counting... nine... eight... seven...
Everyone in the restaurant: *stands up, holding glasses of champagne* Six... five... four... THREE... TWO... ONE!!! HAPPY NEW YEAR! *everyone starts clinking glasses and kissing each other and singing Auld Lang Syne* "Should old acquaintance be forgot..."
Wil: "...all my troubles seemed so far away..."
Tay: *kicks Wil* WRONG SONG, dear.
Wil: OW! Sorry. *starts singing "Walk Like an Egyptian" instead*
Tay: Just... never mind, okay?
Wil: Okay! *gives Tay a New Year's kiss*
Tay: *blinks* You know what my resolution is for 1999?
Wil: What?
Tay: To feed you Spanish fly more often.

Hehehe... END