by Tay Trefenwyd (James Han)

written Thursday, 21 January 1999 © (steal this and DIE ;P)

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*theme music plays*

Elmo: HI! Hahaha! Today on Sesame Street, we have a secret guest, and Elmo is trying to find out who it is! HAHAHA! *walks off* I wonder who it could be...

*in another part of Sesame Street*

Wil: *eats a candy bar* *munch munch* *throws wrapper into an open trash can*
Oscar: *pops out from can* HEY! Did you throw this wrapper onto me??? Why, I oughta-
Wil: Oh! I'm so sorry, I didn't know anyone lived in... there.
Oscar: Well, you know now, so SCRAM! BEAT IT!
Wil: Please, I'm sorry! It was a rotten thing for me to do.
Oscar: Listen, I said- well... yeah, it was a pretty ROTTEN thing to do, wasn't it? I like that, hehehe. So nice and rotten! Come back again sometime! *retreats into the can and slams the lid*
Wil: ... *walks off*

*in another part of Sesame Street, in front of Mr. Hooper's store*

Elmo: Hi Tay! Hahaha!
Tay: Hey, Elmo, have you seen Wil?
Elmo: Who's Wil?
Tay: DAMN! I ruined the surprise guest thing. I feel like David Eddings.
Elmo: What did you say?
Tay: Urm, nothing. If you find this cute blond guy with pointy ears, just tell him to look for me.
Elmo: Oh gee, I don't know, Elmo's too busy looking for today's secret guest, but if Elmo sees the guy you're looking for Elmo will tell him!
Tay: Urr, thanks Elmo. *walks into Hooper's store*
Elmo: No problem! HAHAHA! *shuffles off*

*in another part of Sesame Street*

Big Bird: *sits in his big nest, snoozing* *snores a quivery Big Bird snore, with his beak buried in his chest feathers*
Wil: *stops walking* Oh... oh my gosh!
Big Bird: *snore* *snort snort* Hah? What?
Wil: *gets misty-eyed* It's... it's you!
Big Bird: *looks to his left and then his right* Me?
Wil: MOMMIE! *runs up to the nest and hugs Big Bird* Oh, Mommie... *weep weep cry cry*
Big Bird: Who ARE you?
Wil: *sobbing uncontrollably* I've missed you so much, Mommie... WAAAAH! *sob sob sob*

*back in Hooper's store*

Mr. Hanford: Are you alright, Tay?
Tay: *glumly sips a tall milkshake* I'm worried about Wil. There's no telling what he's getting himself up to. *sigh* *sip*
Mr. Hanford: Who's Wil?
Tay: Urr... eh heh heh... *SIP*
Some Blue Thing: Fear not, Mister Trefenwyd! I, the cute and furry blue Super Grover, will help you find your beloved!
Mr. Hanford: *eyebrows raise* Your beloved?
Tay: *fidgets* Well, I-
Super Grover: No time to waste chatting, Tay sir! Off we go! *picks up Tay unceremoniously and flies out through one of the store windows*

*back at Big Bird's nest*

Wil: *sits in the empty nest, crying* WAAAAH! Mommie! My mommie left me all alone! *sniffle sniffle cry cry*
Some Other Blue Thing: *walks by and stops in front of the nest* Want tasty cookie? Me Cookie Monster!
Wil: *sniffles cutely and looks up* Coo- Cookies? *wipes his eyes with the back of one hand*
Cookie Monster: YAH! I give you these two cookies, and me eat these twenty cookies, okay?
Wil: But that's not fair. *sniffle*
Cookie Monster: *stare* Listen bub, *holds up two furry fingers* two cookies is big, BIG sacrifice for me. You take two or nothing.
Wil: Okay... *sighs and takes a small bite of one of the cookies*
Cookie Monster: Oh, no no no! You not eat like that! Eat cookies like this! *deep breath* COOKIES! AARRRRMMMFPPGGHHFARRAAMMMRRMMM... *smacks lips* *smack smack*
Wil: *brightens* Oh, I get it! *deep breath* COOKIES! AARRRRMMMFPPGGHHFARRAAMMMRRMMM... *smacks lips* *smack smack*
Cookie Monster: YAH! You got the hang of it, kid!
Wil and Cookie Monster: *deep breath* COOKIES! AARRRRMMMFPPGGHHFARRAAMMMRRMMM... *smacks lips* *smack smack*

*flying high in the sky somewhere...*

Tay: DON'T TOUCH ME THERE!
Super Grover: Sorry Mister Trefenwyd, but it's the only way I can keep you from falling. Super Grover to the rescue!

*later, at Big Bird's nest*

Wil and Cookie Monster: *BUUUURRRRP* Ah... *smack smack*
Some Blue Thing Carrying Tay: AaaaaaaaAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH..... *CRASH*
Tay: *gets up* Ow, my head! Can't you even fly properly?
Super Grover: Super Grover always flies properly!
Tay: Urm, okay... *turns* Wil! There you are!
Wil: Hi honey! *BUUUURRRRP*
Tay: That was attractive.
Wil: Yeah! My burp smells like cookies!
Tay: Okay, that does it, we're leaving Sesame Street. You fit in too well here.
Wil: Awwwwwww! *pout pout*
Tay: *does his best sing-songy persuasive voice* We have cookies at home!
Wil: *stops pouting*
Ernie and Bert: *walks by*
Wil: Oh look, it's Bert and Ernie! Hey, you guys, I want to ask you a quick question...
Ernie and Bert: For the hundredth time, WE ARE NOT GAY! *stomps off*
Count: Hondurred? I can count to won hondurred! Ah ah ah! Won! Two! Thurree! Ah ah ah! *thunder rumbles in the distance*
Tay: OH my... This stupid parody is getting out of hand... *grabs Wil by the collar and drags him away*
Wil: Hey, leggo! Where are we going now?
Tay: Let's just say there's some things that I need to "share" with you, except we can't "share" them on a children's show.
Wil: EEP!

*elsewhere*

Elmo: Well, it looks like Elmo never found out who the secret guest was, hahaha! Elmo's gonna go try to find Big Bird! Yeah! Bye-bye everybody! HAHAHA! *walks off*

Voiceover Sounding Suspiciously Like Tay: Sesame Street has been brought to you today by the letters W, O, and by the number 69. Heheheh... bye-bye everybody!

*LMFAO* THE END